…and the milk they supply. I have finally reached my tolerance level for st00pid-ass statements made by otherwise intelligent young science peeps. So I’m staging an intervention, bloggy-style. After this post, I no longer want to hear any bitching about dedicated pumping offices, or somebody’s gonna have one pissed off, sleep-deprived and engorged mama on their ignorant ass.
Here’s the dealio on boobs. They enlarge to the uncomfortable size of melons when you get preggos, then swell even further with milk (engorgement) after shoving out your sweet little parasite. This swelling is painful, but eventually is alleviated as your body figures out how much milk your baby needs. The milk provides all the wonderful nutrients and antibodies your baby requires – more efficiently and for a fraction of the price of formula. After this balance is achieved, the milk must be expressed at regular intervals. Otherwise, your boobs will again swell and leak, possibly through the nursing pads you put on this morning, staining the brand-new shirt you bought since none of your old shirts fit over your new jugs. Additionally, when your boobs are forced to store instead of express this milk, they send a message to your body to stop making milk, leading over time to a decrease in your milk supply.
So when I tell you that I need the designated pumping office now, I actually mean NOW. I will not wait for my nursing pads to overflow. I will not let my boobs become sore from engorgement. And I will NOT lose a cheap and effective nutritional source for my baby. Get outta of my way, or you’re gonna get knocked over the head with a breast pump.