What a difference

What a difference just a couple of days makes. This past Monday, I was freaking out about a failed glucose tolerance test for gestational diabetes, a swarm of seemingly unmanageable items on my work/life to-do list, and a general lack of confidence in my abilities to be a working scientist-mom. Today, things feel like they’ve suddenly been turned upright again. Over the past three days, I got back into my morning jogging routine, cut out a couple of non-essential to-do items, and took a few deep breaths. Not to mention a couple of wonderful conversations with friends – moms and non-moms alike – helped to make me feel quite a bit more human again. Combined, this has allowed me to focus and cross a few of the more daunting items off my to-do list:

  • My first two job applications went out this morning, and my K grant update went out on Monday.
  • Yesterday’s glucose tolerance test was not nearly as awful as it could have been (although getting stuck in the same spot twice in each arm was much more painful than I had expected – I felt like an abused pin cushion all afternoon).
  • In spite of the relative discomfort of getting repeatedly stabbed, I managed to finish up most of my journal club presentation for tomorrow while at the doctor’s office.
  • Because of the work accomplished at the doctor’s office, I’m able to follow through with the bench work I had planned for this week…beautiful, amazing, life-altering data will (hopefully) continue to be churned out.

On top of everything, I just got a message from my doctor that my second glucose tolerance test came back completely normal. w00t!!! I had already learned by Monday night that false positives on the screening test were fairly common, so my stress level had come down quite a bit. But the news I just received feels like the biggest victory I’ve had in a long time.

I’m sure I’ll continue to have freak-outs in the coming months…the hormones from carrying my little Monkey around ensures Monday’s won’t be the last. But, as MicrobeMama commented earlier today, these freak-outs are completely normal. Deep breaths, friends, and blogging seem to help, as long as I don’t let the ensuing guilt keep me down. Of course, controlling the guilt is a topic for another post – possibly in the not-to-distant future. 🙂


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